There is a school of thought that argues that the ‘body is the self.’ What this means is that if you are uncomfortable with your body, then it is extremely hard for you to have high self esteem or to be happy.
Unfortunately, we have been conditioned to believe that we have other ‘selfs’ beyond our bodies, and that we can be happy even if we are uncomfortable with our bodies, which in many cases turns out to be self-delusion because experience has shown that many self-esteem issues which rob many people of their happiness can be traced back to the people not being happy with the bodies they have.
Meanwhile the media continues to bombard us with extremely exaggerated images of what the ideal body should be like. In the case of ladies, we are shown, the ideal body is ultra-thin, with just small curves at the right places. In the case of men, we are shown the ideal body as being bully and muscular – yet not fat. People who don’t conform to this image are portrayed as ugly, and as people whose bodies could do with a bit of fixing here and there, ‘knocking into shape’ in a way of speaking.
Unfortunately, our bodies are not the same. Anybody who has your best interests at heart will tell you that you are unique, and attempting to be an imitation of anybody else will only result in a very poor replica. And while many people assume that this wise saying applies only in things to do with mannerisms, the truth of the matter is that it applies in the physical aspects too – and trying to forge your body to be like the body of such and such a model you saw on the TV is only likely to leave you broken. The people whose bodies are shown as perfect – the ultra-thin models and their ilk – represent only one extreme of the spectrum into which body types fall.
Another truth is that you should love the body you have – and the way to do this is to dispel the notion that there is an ideal body out there you should be living in. The nature of the human spirit is that it is never quite satisfied – which is why the people with the thin bodies so many of us admire wish they had more padding on their body, even as the people with the ‘padding’ wish they were thinner.
In getting to love the body you have, you also need to give up the notion that getting the ‘ideal’ body will solve all your issues, as it simply won’t. It is naïve to imagine that the reason you don’t have many friends is your body, and that having the ideal body will get people flocking to you, as you are bound to get frustrated even if you happen to get the ideal body, whatever that is.
Even if your body genuinely requires fixing – like if you are dangerously overweight – you should first love the body you already love, and then pursue weight loss from a point of loving yourself, as a simple self improvement project.
Tags: fats, genuine, ideal body, love the body, love the body you have, perfect body, self delusion, self-esteem issues, thinness